Maureen Holloway –
THE CANNES FESTIVAL, that annual star-studded booby fest that takes place on the French Riviera, is underway. It opened yesterday with “Grace of Monaco”, which is reportedly a biography of Princess Grace, played by Nicole Kidman. Kelly was an American movie star who married the prince of Monaco, later dying in a car crash, ironically in the hills just across from where the festival is taking place. The royal family has slammed the film, as has everyone else.
Here’s a quote from The Guardian:
It is a film so awe-inspiringly wooden that it is basically a fire-risk. The cringe-factor is ionospherically high. A fleet of ambulances may have to be stationed outside the Palais to take tuxed audiences to hospital afterwards to have their toes uncurled under general anaesthetic.
Part of the problem is that the movie plays fast and loose with the truth. French President Charles de Gaulle never visited Monaco, nor did director Alfred Hitchcock go there to beg Grace to return to Hollywood. Nor was she a break dancer, and at no point did she hang out with Jimi Hendrix.
Equal criticism is being heaped on poor Nicole Kidman’s face. The 46 year old actress now bears a strong resemblance to the Pillsbury Doughboy in that she is both puffy and frozen.
The movie comes on the heels of yet another horrible movie starring Nicole’s friend Naomi Watts, who played Diana, another princess who died in a car crash.
Here’s a true story: Princess Grace and Princess Diana are playing golf in heaven. Princess Grace says I wish I had a driver. Princess Diana says I wish I hadn’t.
Your daily dose of Mo with the Last Word – 05/15/14