Krampus Movie Review
From the creator of Trick ‘r’ Treat (a.k.a the greatest Halloween movie of all time!), and the writer of X-Men: Apocalypse, comes a refreshing take on the Christmas-Horror genre. These movies don’t usually work for most people because it’s really hard to explain away why Santa has up-and-decided to go on a murderous rampage, or how a sentient snowman manages to remain frozen while he’s stabbing babysitters in the shower with his carrot nose.
That said, Christmas stories have always played with elements of horror, stretching as far back as you care to go. It’s a Wonderful Life is essentially an uplifting story of how one man deals with despair so crushing that he attempts suicide before being shown an existence so dreadful he begs for his life back. A Christmas Carol is, truly, a nightmare. An evil bastard is haunted so viciously one evening that it changes his life forever.
While those stories are classics, Christmas-themed Horror Comedies are never high on anyone’s Must-Watch list. Most of us just want to see Bing Crosby sing his way into every starlet’s heart, or watch Bruce Willis save the day with a submachine gun and a bucket of swear words. But then you remember The Nightmare Before Christmas, Edward ScissorHands…..GREMLINS! These classic genre-benders scratch a very specific itch. One you didn’t even realize you had until the credits roll and you’re already reaching for the rewind button, and that’s exactly what you get with what is likely be this year’s most polarizing film.
Sure, I get it. Some people think it’s sacrilegious to use Christmas lights to strangle a person, while some other people just don’t feel comfortable seeing children eaten by a Jack-in-the-Box from Hell, but Krampus has absolutely everything you’re looking for in a traditional Christmas movie. There are kids fist-fighting in a nativity scene, animated sequences akin to the choppy Rudolph specials you worshipped as a youngster, despicable in-laws ruining dinner, and bloodthirsty gingerbread men that will stop at nothing to drag your entire family to the Underworld.
Alright, that last one was a little off-brand but you get the idea. This movie is a lot like your crazy Aunt’s homemade eggnog. It’s traditional, it’s comforting, and it packs a big punch!
If you’re tired of seeing a 90 minute cut+paste about a dysfunctional family sorting out it’s differences over turkey and ugly sweaters, or if you’re dying to see a horror flick during the most sentimental season, grab a big bucket of popcorn and get ready to enjoy my new favourite Christmas movie, and the cult classic of the year.