This has to be my favourite story of the week. Police were called to a home in Brighton, Ontario Tuesday night to see to what appeared to be a domestic dispute. A man could be heard yelling “I hope you die!” and other invective, but when police enterted the home, he was the only one there. Other than his parrot. Which was apparently “beaking off” to him, or so he told police. Shockingly, alcohol was involved. The bird was unharmed, and police did not lay charges. They did consider giving the man a fine, but the parrot said “put it on my bill”.